A fandom discourse thing I’m reminded that I hate

I hate this thing people across fandom do where they need people to:

And if you don’t do the things they demand of you (for some reason… but you do not know these people and they do not know you or anything about you), they will then never listen to you about what you’re actually saying… because you are bad and wrong for not listening to them about this thing.

So they won’t listen to you talk about racism in fandom. They won’t listen to you when you say that no one should be harassed in or because of fandom. They won’t accept that you can think that and also want people to understand that bigotry doesn’t belong in fandom.

And the thing is that we do know no one can talk about everything even if they know it all, so people can’t talk about what they don’t know and people don’t share with them/they don’t search out. (Like this thing about fannish entitlement… if everyone involved has me blocked or I have them blocked and then they hate me… what exactly am I supposed to do here?)

However, at the same time, the expectation in these fandom diss-courses is that that some people, like me, are told they have to account for strangers (or have their friends/followers’ actions misrepresented to where they are told they have to account for that) but it’s coming from people who refuse to check the racists and bullies they’re actually friends with and whose words they hang off of to the point of harassing others.

Too many people in every single part of fandom want to control others. Who we can talk to, what we can create, how we can talk about ourselves and to our friends. And people assume it’s just one portion of fandom, the part that is like “no bad things in fandom ever”, but no… it really isn’t.

A lot of people who you’d think would be all for freedom in fandom period think they get to dictate who can talk to who and who can write about what… and decide on a supposedly “suitable” punishment for them (harassment, shunning, attempts at deplatforming them in some way, etc).

And I remain sick of it.


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